Her Majestys Finest

"Her Majesty's Armed Forces STOP OR I'LL FIRE!!!!!"
WTF??! We are driving down a very quaint street, admittedly it's 2am but that itsn't quite what we wanted to hear. "Can we help you sir?" as he threw himself onto our bonnet, blood smearing down across the AMBULANCE sign thats written backwards.
"275590611 Murphy Her Majesty's armed forces" he shouts again. I look at my crewmate who rolls his eyes back at me. It's going to be one of those nights. By this time a female sergeant has arrived, a copper sergeant, not a soldier one. He gets in the back of the truck and looks like he's been hit by a train. "I demand a medic" he shouts and spits at me. I think about that scene in Withnail and I.
He commando crawls along the floor towards the open door. "Mr Murphy" I say-too late. Another couple of scratches and bumps to add to the collection as he smashes his face in to the concrete.
I get out and stand infront of him. He is delerious and on drugs. "I demand a medic" he yells again and shouts a different set of numbers at me. He is commando crawling towards me, I don't move and he tries to go through me, not around me.
This is what I became a Paramedic for. Mr Murphy spends a night in the cells, at her Majesty's pleasure.